And this is today's spring-y picture of the day, deceptively optimistic. Actually I took it when I went outside to smoke a cigarette and kind of get away a little from the boys dorm that my house has become. I know, I like this and I asked for it but still, it makes me sad when everyone is all having fun and when I poke my head in they either tell me to go put on my burqa (that would be my charming, lovely son) or they all shut up and look at me expectantly like puppies waiting for news of dinner. Also, I'm tired of everything always being a mess. I know, I need to put my foot down but then you know, I've never been any good at confrontations or, god forbid, discipline. I'd be okay with it all if they'd just let me play, anyway.
Actually I have a lot of thougts about teenage boys and this generation and the fear of sex - the way that they've been told since birth that sex is a deadly scary thing that can kill you has, I think, messed them up a little. Or maybe teenage boys have always been afraid of women and I just never noticed it before. Or maybe my other theory, which is that it's actually women who think about sex all the time and not men, is being proven correct. I don't know. These kids are more comfortable with hardcore violence on the screen (American History X) than kinky sex (Lair of the White Worm;) that's for sure. They would now jeer and tell me that Lair of the White Worm is just a sucky movie, granted. And I think that M's current fascination with Islamic terrorists has a lot to do with attempting to assert control of the women in his life. At which point he would jeer and say, that no, it isn't, and besides, Muslims don't oppress women, that's a western fabrication (this is untrue) and then I would realize that, after alll, this is the most taboo, rotten thing he can think of to get involved in and the one that is guaranteed to push all my buttons simultaneously. So that may have more to do with it than anything else. Still. When I was in my teens and early 20s all I wanted to do was get high and have sex, not necessarily in that order, and so did all my friends. These kids seem shy of it somehow, but probably I am extrapolating a trend where none exists. It's hard to say.
And I grant you it may just be that the den mother, which is me, should not know of such things, ever, ever, ever. This is quite possible.
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teenage boys are afraid of girls and terrified of women (for a teenage boy a woman is anyone over the age of 20) Tho they would never admit it, even under pain of torture by wacky Islamic terroristas. While it has been uh a few years since I was a teenage boy I can't imagine that being a teenage boy has changed all that much, and considering that they have the internet now, with its various accouterments, I would shocked if they still didn't think about sex constantly---of course I could be wrong, as most of what people do confounds me, but there's my two convoluted cents...
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