Changing Ones Mind

dandelion
Originally uploaded by mygothlaundry

I am not going to Greensboro to see the remnants of the Grateful Dead after all. I'm sure you're shocked. There were 36 hours there, you see, where I was going to go see the Dead with my friend Charles and then there was a later part where our friend Susan was going to meet us there driving up from Florida and we were all, including Mojo, going to stay in a motel room overnight. However, a small wailing noise of doom began to emanate from my bank account and that, combined with an uneasy deep seated feeling that I am just too old to drop acid in a parking lot before a Dead show - look, I'm in my mid forties. Shouldn't I be sitting at an elegant cocktail lounge in a black cocktail dress right around now, sipping an elegant drink in an elegant glass while an elegant man lights my cigarette? Yes. Yes, I should be doing that, not seriously considering digging up the old hippie skirts and whirling around barefoot with a mind full of chemicals. What happened to my life? - made it impossible for me to proceed with those plans. I suck and I'm sorry, oh my friends who were counting on me, but quite honestly I'm too broke. Such is life, even in the mid forties.

So I have a three day weekend this weekend and absolutely nothing to do and I am completely thrilled. I mean, I have a list of Tasks and Chores but I have no Places I Must Be at a Certain Time and this sounds like the very definition of paradise to me right now. It's been a long week for some reason and peace - as much peace as I can get, surrounded by three dogs and Pebble, which is to say, not a whole lot as most people define peace - is exactly what I need.

I also need Pebble to stop being such a drama queen. She meows and howls her woes around the house and it's gotten to the point where I have to hold her on my lap, pet her and say, "Your fortitude in the face of your terrible, terrible existence is an example to us all." It is true that she is not allowed to go outside with the dogs (the horror!) and there are times when I like to be in the bathroom alone (the sheer selfishness!) and she's not supposed to get into the dishwasher, washing machine or dryer (fiendish!) but overall I think her life is not quite as painful as she makes it out to be.