Friday, January 20, 2006

Rental Car And An Old Meme, Revisited

I rented a car today, wahoo! Naturally this took longer than it should have, because the first car they gave me, a PT Cruiser, didn't have a CD player. Fuck that, I know my rights, and my $22 a day entitles me to blow those speakers, baby. What madness could have inspired the car people to put a cassette deck into a 2005 car is also somewhat mind boggling; I personally own the last extant cassettes of the world (the Smiths! the Ramones! . . Men at Work, gah!), and they're getting kind of stretchy and creaky. By the way, what they say about PT Cruisers having no visibility is essentially true: great style, creepy to drive. I had to take it up the highway to the next rental place so they could give me a nondescript blue Chevy, with a working CD player and a bass boost that rumbles the doors. Yeah. I went up to Celo with 6 Japanese swords (a late Christmas present from M's dad) in the back seat and Mary Prankster shaking the frame and all was well in my world. The cows are all lying down out there, though, so your Hangover Journal Early Weather Change Warning System is now advising you that Mom always says cows lie down when the weather is going to change. Bring your umbrella, or, do as I do: forget it. If you bring it you'll just feel dumb anyway: walking around trying to juggle purse, umbrella, coffee, cigarette and probably a file folder full of papers. On the way back M played me wild surf music, his latest craze, and that too was good.

Tomorrow I am going up the other side of the mountain to Sapphire for my uncle's memorial service. I am bringing my mother and so I doubt there will be punk rock, alas, she doesn't like to play music in the car. The rental car was her idea though, so I won't complain. She didn't want to show up in front of the family in my Asheville hippiemobile and really, who could blame her? I get a little leery of it myself whenever I venture out of city limits, although of course that rarely happens. It's somehow easy to forget, in Asheville, that not everyone is majorly tattooed and driving a biodiesel station wagon covered with fading stickers. Kayak on the top and border collie with bandanna optional, but preferred.

The Old Meme I am Revisiting is: Songs in List Form. Here is my contribution to the genre, inspired, of course, by driving along listening the the Clash:

Where I am:
- all lost
- the supermarket

How I feel:
- Unhappy

Why I’m here:
- Special offer
- Guaranteed personality

My background:
- Fell Out
- Unnoticed
- Lived in suburbs
- Shorter than hedge

What I heard then:
- People on ceiling, fighting

What I do:
- Watch TV
- Save tea coupons
- Listen to disco record
- Drink

What I hear now:
- Kids in halls
- Pipes in walls
- Phone calls
- Silence

Where I am:
- Lost.


syntax said...

heh... i just did one for the song i was listening to a few minutes ago - "sheela-na-gig" by pj harvey...

things that she's been consistently trying to show you:
- child-bearing hips
- ruby-red ruby lips
- workstrong arms
- bottle full of charms

what she lays at your feet:
- it all

your reply:
- "sheela-na-gig, you exhibitionist!"

what she's going to do
- wash that man right out of her hair

a place to put money:
- in your idol hole

what he said:
- wash your breasts
- i don't want to be unclean
- please take those dirty pillows away from me

mygothlaundry said...

That's great. It's strange how much fun these are.