What I am about to write is the kind of thing that, if somebody else told it to me, I would back away slowly, speaking in a reassuring tone of voice and looking for the exit. Then I might start laughing and throwing sticks at them. Nevertheless, I am going to go out on the proverbial limb here and let the proverbial shit hit the proverbial fan:
I believe fate and my dead dog had something to do with bringing Jackson into my life. I think this is destiny at work.
*ducks, dodges sticks, laughs hysterically, slugs whiskey, listens to the Ramones*
No, really, seriously, I do. Although I am very scared about writing this down, because I'm afraid I'm cursing myself. My experience with gifts from the gods is that they usually tend to have more in common with the Monkey's Paw than with perfect Christmas presents from your favorite wealthy relative. Alas, but there you go. Also, every time I fall madly in love really quickly, it's doomed. It's also doomed when I fall in love slowly, but we won't invoke that example here. For our purposes, that example is not relevant. So I was terrified all day that I would get home and Jackson would have disappeared. He didn't, he hasn't, and I'm still in love with him. I think I needed him. I think Toby sent him. I think the gods took a hand and my guardian angel (okay, yeah, I know, but I kind of believe in them, not really, but kind of, just a little, I know it's ridiculous, but I swear to you I saw mine, when I was 8, and it was a big black dog. Naturally my guardian angel would take the form often ascribed to Satan - that's kind of why I still believe) but at any rate, my work life is sucking at kind of an all time low, I'm stressed, I'm not having sex, I miss my dog - and it would be just like Toby to bargain his way around heaven & make them send me another dog.
Which leads me to ask, is this my rebound dog? You know how when you break up with a lover, and the only thing you want in the world is another lover, so you find one, and he's actually some kind of horrifying troglodyte, but you can't see it, no, you fall in love overnight? Or maybe that's just me. So anyway, I lost Toby, as we know, and I've been devastated, and now I have a new dog. Is Jackson my rebound dog? Will I wake up horribly disillusioned some time in the next six months? That would suck. I'm enjoying this being in love feeling.
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