Saturday, March 29, 2008

me and endo the snake behind the westville

S and I went over to the Westville for a couple of beers early yesterday evening and there was a guy with a large boa constrictor named Endo. I am fond of snakes - well, I'm fond of snakes when I know they're tame and I'm not stumbling across them unexpectedly out in the woods - and so I got to hang out with Endo for a little while. Very cool; it had been a long time since I held a snake. If you don't count a boyfriend or two back in the dark old days, that is.

The weather was so nice yesterday that I had a sudden brainstorm and decided to throw a spur of the moment party on my deck. S & C & Z & H & J all came over and we drank a lot of beer and ate a bunch of party food. In a moment of trashy hors d'oeuvre glory, I made these oh so fancy sausage rolls by wrapping whop crescent roll dough (Laura Lynn brand, too, hon) around pieces of Italian sausage flavored kielbasa. They were extremely tasty although I do not, on the whole, recommend the Italian sausage flavored Polish sausage, since it just seems to be kind of a sudden cultural mix whose time has not yet come. It's disconcerting, to say the least, but who really cares about the flavor of the sausage when it's wrapped in the doughy wonder that are store brand whop on the counter type crescent rolls? Yum. And a good time was had by all. Impromptu parties are always the best parties.

Therefore, I have done not a damn thing all day but lie around in bed reading fantasy novels and frankly, my dear, it's been wonderful and I do not feel even the smallest shred of guilt. I feel a little guilty about the amount of leftover party food I've devoured in bed, yes, but the lying around part has been awesome and anyway, it's raining. However, while speaking of ideas whose time has not yet come, I did have to run to the drugstore early this morning and I noticed that they now have menopause tests on the shelves. Menopause tests. I hate to break it to the marketing department of whoever thought this was a good idea but, look, menopause is just not like pregnancy. There's no time crunch here, like, OMG I have to run to the drugstore to get a menopause test in case I'm menopausal and, frankly, if you are going through perimenopause or the real thing? You do not need a test. No, really, you don't. So unless it's made of glass and will make a good, satisfying noise as it shatters against the wall, trust me, it's useless.

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